Six Ways to Celebrate Valentines…Single AND Married!

Valentine’s Day is one of those days that people either LOVE…or they HATE. I fall somewhere in the middle. I think if we are going to have a ‘holiday’, there can be some fun, and some meaningful things, had from this day. Whether you are single, dating, engaged, married, divorced, or widowed, there is something in this day for you.

Joshua and I have only ever celebrated Valentines Day while we were on a debt free journey…so needless to say, we have gotten really creative in how we have spent our Valentines Days with free date nights and finding ways to love on others. Our first year was a MAJOR flunk. We were still trying to learn each others love languages in the first year of marriage, and boy did we get it wrong that first valentines married. Josh tried something to show me love, and it didn’t live up to my expectations, so we fought…hard. We ended the night in tears and so discouraged. Our second year though, after learning more about each other, and communicating about how we each feel loved, he knocked it out of the park with a surprise camp out in our basement. These moments are so precious to me, in all of their imperfection and joy, and it is so fun to look back.

However, before we were married, I loved (And still do!) spending time with my galentines. So many of my Valentines days were spent out to dinner or swing dancing or having a chick flick movie nights in stuffing my face with chocolate with my best galentines, and I would not trade those memories and friendships for the world. Those gals ended up standing beside me at my wedding, and now, are trusted friends as Joshua and I grow in marriage.

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No matter what season you find yourself in today, this 2019 Valentines Day, here are 6 ways to celebrate this day:

I- SNAIL MAIL: No matter what stage of life you are in, we will never get too old or too married or too single or too anything to love snail mail. Last year I had so much fun hand calligraphing letters to a few of my local galentines. In their letters, I shared with them how they made me feel, and why they were important to me. I may or may not have also left them with some homemade chocolate chip banana bread. Snail mail is a sweet and timeless way to celebrate and speak truth into the people you love.

II- SERVE SOMEONE WHO IS HURTING: I remember a few Valentines Days where my heart was just broken. Maybe you have had those valentines days too: your boyfriend just broke up with you, you got some really bad body scans back from the doctor, you just discovered there are deep hurts in your family or friendships and they are causing you to hurt too, you experienced a miscarriage this month, you just lost your spouse, you’re exhausted on a debt free journey, you just made a massive mistake in your small business and your just having a really hard day, or maybe you just found out about infidelity in your marriage. Friend, this kind of hurt happens to everyone. There are so many people hurting silently as this day comes and goes, and this Valentines, I want to challenge you to find a way to serve others well who may be hurting: a phone call to simply ask how they are doing, a box of chocolates with scripture attached, go grocery shopping with that new young widow, watch a chick flick and give them the space to laugh, or send them $10 on Venmo to pick up dinner on their way home from work. These are all just ideas to get your mind thinking, but at the end of the day, you know your hurting friends best. What do they need on this day?

III- HAVE A GALENTINES NIGHT: As a married woman, I will tell you that there is nothing that will replace a good girls night, especially on Valentines. Text a few of your best gals, tell them to bring the chocolate, and lay out all the games on the table, because it Galentine night. I look back on the many fancy little black dress Galentine dinners I went on in my life, and they are some of the sweetest memories. It is a good thing to invest in the people you have around you right now, not matter your status. Single, married, divorced, widowed, Galentines night is a sweet way to invest in your women friends.

IV- GIVE YOURSELF SOME SELF-CARE: Sometimes, it is a GOOD thing to stop, take a breath from all the doing and running around, and invest in some good ole fashioned self care. Get your nails done with a friend. Go to the spa with your momma. Eat a really good, healthy meal that you made from scratch. Go for a long walk or a run or get in that good workout at the gym. Spend time in the word, or curl up on the couch with a book. We love other people better by caring for ourselves and being healthy; mentally, physically , emotionally, and spiritually! What would self-care this Valentines Day look like for you?

V- PURCHASE WEDDING VOWS AS A GIFT: Husbands, I am speaking to you! Did you know that husbands inquire more than women about wedding vows from me? They love to gift them to their wives. If you are looking for a gift for your wife, or even wives, for you husband, wedding vows are sure to be a HIT. (Especially if you have a one-year-paper-versary coming up! Hint hint, year one is the paper anniversary!) I cannot wait to hear your love story as I calligraph your precious vows.

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VI- DATE YOUR SPOUSE: When you get married, you are marrying someone who IS going to change. They will not be the same person today as they will be 5 years from now. If you are not intentional to date your spouse, and continue to choose to date them and get to know them as you both grow and change, it could cause you to drift away. If you are married, I would highly encourage you to choose to date your spouse this Valentines. Whether you are on a debt free journey, or you are making millions, make this your number one priority. Joshua and I will be spending our evening at our home group, opening the word with the community we have invested in for the past 3 years, and we are beyond blessed. But friend, hire the babysitter. Make the reservation at the restaurant. Get the groceries to cook dinner in. Make the investment. Do something you may hate doing because you know your spouse will love it. I dont care what you need to do to make a date night happen, but marriage is too great a cost to not date your spouse.

Have a sweet, fun, and intentional Valentines Day, friend! No matter what season of life you are in! I hope one of these ways to celebrate love resonates with you, and that they have give you some new perspectives on Valentines Day.

Sweet blessings,

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Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.
— 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a
Ashley Craft